Today
was one of those days when I felt overwhelmed and the walls were closing in on
me. It was raining and my mood was stormier than the clouds rolling in.
Rain,
itself, is a double-edged sword. The soybeans planted in the fields by the
house are happy and growing nicely. The rain makes the grass look a lovely
shade of green, but it needs to be mowed, and it’s too wet to mow. Lately, it’s
either too wet or too hot to work outside. A few days ago, I trimmed the hedges
and some of the more offensive grass near the house, and nearly had heat stroke.
Guess
that leaves the endless inside work. I always need to decide whether to do
housework or computer work. They both seem to have no beginning and no end. The
to-do list never turns to a “done” list. I just keep moving the unfinished
projects forward to the next list.
This
week I planned to watch the Alzheimer’s Association International Conference on
research. I never realized how many sessions, chats, posters, etc. that would
be available. I thought the AAIC conference would be good preparation for the Alzheimer’s
Research Peer Review program that will be starting soon. There’s that
double-edged sword again. If I spend the time to watch a week’s worth of AAIC videos,
I won’t finish other projects to clear the way for the Peer Review program.
It
rained yesterday, but mentally, I felt good. I had crossed several things off
my to-do list and the 2020 blog book,
Love Is Action, was being reviewed. My smugness didn’t last long—the book
was kicked back for cover size. We went to work on uploading a new cover, but
it was looking weirder and weirder. Finally, my husband used his old pc to
print the pdf, and we were in business.
Until
this morning when we flunked review again. So that item flew back onto my
figurative plate. To make matters worse, I accidentally sent it back for review
before we made the correction. I called to see if we could cancel the review
and found out that an automatic review cannot be stopped. It’s going to be
another 72 hours before I can fix that one.
During
my meltdown this morning, my husband told me that I needed to prioritize and
finish the most important projects first. That’s good advice except when I
think I’ve finished a project and try to move on, but have to erase the
checkmark next to the most time consuming item on the list—“Work on Blog Book.”
It’s
hard to complete projects when I can’t work without interruption. Every time I
sit in front of the PC to work, my dog takes that as a signal that I can either
(a) play with her, or (b) take her outside. She doesn’t like to take no for an
answer. The phone rings—telemarketer again, and again. My email dings, a text
comes in, the dryer buzzes, or the oven timer goes off.
On
rainy days, my body aches, my hands hurt when I type, and my attention span
wanes when I get tired. My mind flits here, there, and everywhere as I attempt
to prioritize more and multitask less. In the meantime, I might as well have a
cup of coffee and take a chill pill and listen to the rain splash against the
window.
Copyright
© July 2020 by L.S. Fisher
#ENDALZ
2 comments:
So sad, but anyone who has looked after a loved one with dementia will know how hard it is physically and mentally. My heart goes out to anyone/everyone affected by Alzheimer/Dementia. A huge shout out to any caregiver doing this alone! I feel your journey. I feel your pain because I've been there. My mom was also diagnosed in her 60s. Feeling absolutely shattered, heartbroken and drained , working with different physicians across the country with little or no improvement. I was exhausted and overwhelmed to look any further. Crying a lot through frustration, anger and despair, But today with the help of Homeocure Worldwide Natural Medicine, my mother is completely healthy and well again. I think we only need more support and sunlight to overcome this dreadful disease. Search for support regardless and don't stop until you get it. With Homeocure Worldwide treatment, there is hope, don't give up! Check out this blog for useful info️; homeocureworldwide.blogspot.com
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