The other movie I watched, strangely for the first time, was Thelma and Louise. The adventures of the friends quickly turn into misadventures. Louise threatened to shoot a man who was attempting to rape Thelma. He made the mistake of yelling at her that he should have continued, so Louise shot and killed him. Later, after a hitchhiker stole their money, Thelma robbed a liquor store. As an armada of police cars chases the two fugitives, they opt to kiss, grab hands and “keep going” and fly their Thunderbird into a canyon. Friends to the end.
Friends that earn our undying love are few and far between, but that does not devalue friends who celebrate our successes and support us when we fail. We gain friends throughout life who share common goals.
Our first friends are family. Our cousins and immediate family members share life experiences with us. When we begin school, we gain other friends. Several of the women in my high school graduating class meet monthly for lunch. Our friendship is stronger now than it was when we saw each other on a daily basis.
As we grow older, our in-laws become part of our family. Jim and I both came from large families and I gained a multitude of in-laws throughout my lifetime. His family became my family.
Thelma and Louise became friends at work. Considering how many hours a person spends at their job throughout their lifetime, it is not surprising that some of our co-workers become our closest friends and confidants.
In 1998, after Jim showed obvious signs of dementia, I began volunteering for the Alzheimer’s Association. I opened up my heart to persons with dementia, other volunteers, and staff at our local Alzheimer’s Association Chapter. My world expanded to annual advocacy trips to Washington, DC, where I forged additional friendships. Distance and time do not diminish the special bond that I have with my fellow Alzheimer’s advocates.
When I joined BPW (now, Sedalia Business Women) in 2006, I had no clue as to how many new friends I would make. Now, many of them are old friends, and as our club grows, I make new friends on an ongoing basis. Like Patsy and Loretta, we don’t always agree on everything, but the friendship doesn’t waver.
Later in life, I gained friendships through church, line dancing, and music. During the past trying years, I’ve mostly watch services on my cell phone and arthritis ended line dancing but I still hold these friends in my heart. Music has taken a larger part in my life after I learned to play the ukulele and joined the family band. This has been a two- or three-fold advantage. I see much more of my family, renew old ties with friends who are in nursing homes, meet new friends, and learn to know other musicians.
A song says “you can’t make old friends” but I don’t believe that. Sometimes you meet someone who seems like an old soul. It’s hard to explain an immediate strong connection and it almost feels as if the person is not merely an “old” friend, but an ancient friend. That was how my friendship and love for Jim felt. Almost from the beginning, Jim said he would lay down his life for me. I never once doubted that he meant it. After I met Jim, my life began the destiny that made me the person I am today.
Jim’s endless love gave me the courage to live life and love fearlessly. Yes, I open myself up to grief and loss, but it is well worth it.
Copyright © May 2024 by L.S. Fisher
http://earlyonset.blogspot.com
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