Helping Others Helps Yourself

 

My dad used to say that when you were in the army, you should never volunteer for anything. I believe that makes a lot of sense when you are in a warzone. I remember Jim sending letters home from Vietnam and telling me that his buddy, Webb, volunteered them to make trips to a place he called “Duc Duc.” I got the distinct impression that traveling to this place was more dangerous than staying in Long Bihn.

Although volunteering for a dangerous mission might not be good for your health, volunteering for a charitable organization has several health benefits. Helping others helps both mental and physical health.

I’ve been a volunteer for the Alzheimer’s Association since 1998. As with most volunteers, I pitched in to help an organization that helped me. I was in contact with my local chapter from the time that Jim first developed symptoms. Over the years, I served on the Board of Directors, as a state and national advocate, support group facilitator, speaker, and chaired the local Walk.

When I read about the proven benefits of being a volunteer, I agree wholeheartedly. I often felt like I benefited more from being a volunteer than the Alzheimer’s Association benefited from me being a volunteer. 

Mental Benefits:

·       Reduces Stress, Anxiety, and Depression

·       Gives a Sense of Purpose

·       Increases Happiness

·       Encourages Social Interaction and Forges New Friendships

·       Promotes Emotional Healing

Mentally, volunteering became my lifeline in a sea of uncertainty. As I threw myself into the varied activities, I met other people who understood the life-shattering differences perpetrated by dementia. I connected with sisters of the heart who became life-long friends.

One time someone suggested that I give up volunteering for the Alzheimer’s Association, but I told them that although I couldn’t stop the progression of the disease, I had found a way to make a difference. I became a better caregiver when I focused on promoting awareness, seeking knowledge about dementia, and advocating for effective treatments.

Every person does not have to start at the beginning of the learning curve. Through support group, and from the professionals who worked at the Alzheimer’s Association, I learned about everything from how to avoid financial pitfalls to caregiving tips. 

Physical Benefits:

·       Increases Physical Activity

·       Lowers Blood Pressure

·       Improves Heart Health

·       Decreases Pain Level

Studies show that people who stay actively engaged in life have better physical health. I really think part of it might be that you simply have less time to feel sorry for yourself.

I attended a seminar once where the speaker talked about focus. “If you focus on red cars, you will be surprised at how many red cars you will see.” Focusing on your health means you are more cognizant of your choices.

Have you ever noticed that people who actively volunteer, usually volunteer for more than one organization? It’s because once your focus is on how to make a positive impact, you can plainly see the need.

Often the most traumatic events in our lives motivate us into action. Whether that action is participating in an event, providing financial support, or offering a helping hand—each of us can make a positive impact on our community.

 

alz.org/sedaliawalk

Copyright ©July 2025 by L. S. Fisher

http://earlyonset.blogspot.com

#ENDALZ

 

Liquid Love

I made it all the way through my brother’s celebration of life without crying. Sure, my eyes were a little blurry at times, but I held it together in that moment. I read two of his stories and a short piece I had written about him.

The next evening at church services, when Pastor Christopher spoke to me, the tears I’d held back the previous day fell as I told him I’d lost my brother. He said my tears were “liquid love.” Through the years of my life, I’ve shed buckets of liquid love for family members, friends, and beloved pets.

Life, for most of us, is full of gladness and sadness. Those who say they are blessed are the ones who have the most love to give and the heartache that walks hand in hand with love lost. Each of us has to balance the gain against the pain.

Once I said that my two husbands, Jim and Harold, had nothing in common. They were about as unalike as two people can be. Then, a friend pointed out to me that they both loved me so they did have something in common.

I shed liquid love over Jim’s diagnosis and his failing health. Throughout the years of his dementia, I learned that love comes in many shapes and sizes. The people who cared enough to provide support and acts of kindness showed their love in tangible ways. My family and Jim’s family were the wind beneath my wings that kept me from crashing and burning.

As all who have lost a love one knows, the quiet moments are the most unbearable. They are the times of regret and unbridled sorrow. When you don’t have to be strong for anyone else, it is easy to dwell on the future that could have been and compare it to the one that never will be. The wounds are broken open and healing is delayed.

Grief has no timeline. Although twenty years may pass, and other loves come and go, a song, a random memory, or a photo can make a person time travel through the years and a fresh round of grief.

As I’ve grow older, the scars on my heart have accumulated. I’ve been widowed twice, but I refuse to measure life with sorrow. Instead, I will measure my life with blessings. I am blessed to have my family, two extended families, a multitude of friends, and a lovable dog.

My arthritic body makes me appreciate any pain-free days. When I feel like I’ve walked through fire, I gratefully accept the offer of a pool of cold water to soothe the burn.

Liquid love doesn’t have to be tears of sorrow—it can be tears of joy. Each sunrise brings the promise of hope and a dawning of possibilities. When a day has been well spent, sunset will bring a hush of peace and calm.    

 

Copyright ©July 2025 by L. S. Fisher

http://earlyonset.blogspot.com

#ENDALZ