Before the holidays, I bought myself a Christmas present. I happen to like Bailey’s in my coffee, and I found the perfect gift set. One gift set combined a bottle of Bailey’s with a clear coffee cup.
The clear coffee cup reminded me of a business trip Jim and I took to San Antonio, Texas. We stayed at a swanky hotel that served their delicious coffee in clear cups. Jim and I both enjoyed spending time in the lobby drinking cups of coffee to relax. It’s a good memory from one of our adventures.
Anyone who knows me well is aware that the only way I ever start my day is with a good cup of coffee. My pot is on an automatic timer so that I don’t have to do anything but pour the coffee in the cup. On my best days, I get to drink my first cup of coffee in complete silence.
Last week, I rolled out of bed one morning, grabbed my clear cup, put in creamer, and poured a cup of coffee. As I headed to the couch in the kitchen, I lifted the coffee to my lips and before I took my first drink, I realized I had the measuring cup instead of my Bailey’s cup. One good thing about the measuring cup—it has a spout so it was easy to transfer one transparent cup to the other.
The advantage of a transparent cup is that you can see the goodness of the coffee within. Another observation is that I could also clearly see the coffee in the measuring cup, but it didn’t meet my expectations.
People aren’t usually very transparent. Wouldn’t it be awful if your thoughts appeared in bubbles over your head for others to see? So many hurtful things are better left unspoken.
Dementia can erase a person’s filter, and they may say exactly what they think. After Jim quit smoking, he would tell complete strangers, “You better quit smoking those damned cigarettes!” It was what he thought, and it came out of his mouth. I’m sure he was trying to help, but he forgot how huffy he would have been if someone had said such a thing to him when he was still smoking.
Transparency in a relationship means that you can trust your partner, spouse, or friend to be honest with you. You know what to expect and you aren’t trying to guess what another’s motives are. A transparent relationship has open communication and you are confident enough to share your honest feelings and opinions.
Some of us are lucky enough to find soul mates, soul sisters, or friends that can lift your spirits just to hear their voice on the phone. I feel fortunate to have increased my circle of loved ones over the years.
Too often older people can feel isolated and depressed because they suffer the loss of people they love. The most difficult challenge in life is to go on living after a devastating loss. You wake up feeling normal, and then like a lightning bolt your heart takes a direct hit when you remember that you will never see your loved one again. Love hurts, but love heals.
Transparency is an honorable way to live when tempered with love and kindness. Whether your truth is as beautiful as a crystal clear coffee mug or as practical as a transparent measuring cup, life is good when you are loved for being your own unique self.
Copyright
© Jan 2024 by L.S. Fisher
http://earlyonset.blogspot.com
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